Go on a date!…with your kids

No, I’m really serious.

Go on a date with your kids.

Mike and I stumbled upon this idea when our kids were tiny. I remember taking Jensen to one of those trampoline set ups where he was hooked into straps, bouncing and flipping to his hearts content. Emma went with her Dad to dinner at Red Lobster one time while Jensen and I stayed home, ordered pizza and watched a movie together.

There’s no wrong way to do it, but I found that in the past few years of dating our kids, we each seem closer as a result.

I firmly believe that it is crucial to our family for each of us to be comfortable with where we fit in. Chores and general responsibility truly help this. How encouraging is it to hear from a parent that a child is NEEDED? It’s vital. Our kids need to hear that they bring value to our family.

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Emma and I at my brother’s wedding

But going on dates and enjoying a laid back experience together is also important.

For instance, sometimes Emma really needs some extra time with her dad. I am usually the first to notice, and I will tell Mike, “Hey, Babe, it might be good for Emma for you to take her out on a date.”

We try to plan something within the next few days, and I take Jensen out at the same time. Now, I understand that this works somewhat seamlessly as we have two kids, but it is worth it to figure out how to spend one on one time individually with each kid even if you have a larger family. They certainly will appreciate your effort.

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Mike and Jensen at my brother’s wedding

As the oldest of seven siblings, I certainly did.

I remember a few times that my dad took me out on a date when I was a little kid. Those memories still stay with me to this day.

Does it have to be expensive? Nope, it sure doesn’t. In February, Mike took Jensen on a hike in the Redwoods (free) while Emma and I went to the library to scour the shelves for new Diary of a Wimpy Kid books (also free).

Does it have to be well planned? Definitely not, as many times one of the kids needs that one on one time and the other kid is doing okay. Last week, Emma and I had a planned “girls day” which included eating sushi and getting our nails done.

At the last minute, Mike realized that if he dropped us off at the nail salon, he and Jensen could grab some Chick-fil-A before they had to meet us back at karate class. The impromptu date for Mike and Jensen during the scheduled date for Emma and I, worked out wonderfully for the boys.

Does it need to be often? That depends on what your kids need. Again, our dates with our kids revolve around the observation that one of the kids needs to hang out with one of us. That demands some attention on our part. If you are unable to be that attentive due to schedule or whatever, then just make it a built in occurrence.

As a mom, I am always wondering if I’m doing a good job, and I even doubt myself at times. However, these date times with my kids really help me understand them as individuals a little more and allow me to slow down while enjoying these little people God has given me.

Parenting and family life is a glorious adventure!

Yours Truly,

Marlie

11 thoughts on “Go on a date!…with your kids

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      1. Seeing as DATES have a romantic connotation and being romantic with your own blood is illegal and downright wrong, yes it implies that. You’re very aware of that since you started your post with “No, I’m really serious” Because you know exactly what it sounds like.

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      2. No, it was meant in a many blog posts are about couples doing date nights…not kids having time with their parents individually. It’s sad that you see it that way. Our dates with our kids are good fun, and they’re a wonderful way to build relationships with our kids.

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      3. Kids having time with their parents is not the same as having dates with your kids. In one post you stated ‘I wonder why I blog..” I also wonder that too if you’re going to spew this kind of sick stuff. I’m at least thankful you barely have any followers or views, I wonder why.

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  1. We do “dates” with our child…there are different types of dates. When I hear date I don’t automatically assume romantic. Father daughter dances have dinner and dancing does that make it “wrong” no because not every person thinks like that. I LOVE reading your blogs so keep em coming! And to those who find it offensive then feel free to move along. What you are doing with your family is amazing!

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  2. I love this! Children need their parents more than ever in this day and age. So many times we get caught up with all of our faces in screens and forget about that one on one personal time. (not just a text message that says I love you) Unfortunately, there are people like the coffee person above who will never be happy in life unless you live life exactly the way they think you should. Dating by all means does not equal molesting. That is disgusting to even say or think that, especially about children. Dating is a time to get to know each other better in all meanings of the word. Keep writing. I love your stuff!

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  3. A “date” indicates you care enough about a person to block time in your busy schedule to spend it with them. My favorites are coffee dates with my daughter, or my mom, or my sister! Of course my husband and block time for each other as well. Making time for each other builds relationships! Isn’t that what we want to do with our children?
    Just my two cents

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  4. This is exactly what so many kids are missing out on today…quality one on one time with their parents. Well done Mike and Marlie for setting an example of the joy that comes from investing in the relationships with your kids. They are going to have some amazing memories with all the love and family adventures! ❤

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